One of my readers has asked that I comment on California. As you can imagine this is a rather broad topic as California is a rather large state. One should realize that while so many things in California seem larger than life, they’re really just “special.”

The “California lifestyle” could be described as special. They are so many things going one in the California lifestyle that typically go unchecked that, like mold, gets out of control quickly.

For example, the whole sun thing they have going. It’s always sunny in California and you can’t get away from it. People in the rest of the country think Californians are vain because they are always wearing sun glasses. In truth, they have to wear them or the sun will drive them crazy. This is not likely to be noticed as being crazy is quite relative in the “Golden state.” When I visit, I take eye drops because there is such constant sun, my eyes are dry at the end of each day. Makes one wonder what the pot smokers have to go through.

Another larger than life phenomenon in California is that everyone is special. Everything in California has to be special for everyone. For example, your particular vegetarianism is vastly different from everyone else’s and thus, more special. Long discussions about the relative merit of eating versus juicing kale can be overheard in many places. In addition, vocalized concern about possible toxicity in too much kale intake is bandied about. One can be a vegetarian with only certain colors of vegetables that correspond with the colors in your light chakras. This is purported to enhance your vibrations with the universe. Who doesn’t want that? It makes you special.

In most areas, aromatherapy is considered mainstream but in California crystal therapy can help enhance your life (or specialness) and someone who can read crystals is really special. Not sure what their average annual income is, but they’re special.

Coffee is another area where one can distinguish oneself as being special. Standing in line at a local coffee shop or a chain like Starbucks, one can announce one’s specialness. You can do this by ordering your coffee in such a way that it takes the barista five minutes to write down your order while others stand by watching and waiting to give their own special coffee order.

Clothing is special and wearing less of it makes one more special. The way to make this point is to have one’s body enhanced through plastic surgery and then wear clothing that will strategically reveal various enhanced parts thereby making one more special. You will see repeatedly at the Oscars. Those people are quite special.

It could be said that the pressure of living in California can be demanding. Finding ways to make oneself special in the eyes of other people that are already special can be challenging and strenuous. The constant effort can be exhausting. The good thing is, no one has to know what anyone is going through because they all have their sunglasses on.

As the seasons change and the temperatures in the Midwest start to cool, there are lots of things to notice on the landscape. Flowers are at their peak during this time of year. Sidewalk café’s are hidden behind fences of bright lime toned sweet potato vines and ruby hued coleus. Brightly colored clematis works its way up fence posts and lamp posts alike. Petunias star in their own show with fuschia’s, pinks and reds. Sunflowers hang their heads of dark butter colored petals and midnight black seeds. If I made my living by looking for nectar, this would rate at the best time of year.

Presumably that’s what wasps think too. The reason I believe that is because I typically have a wasp infestation around this time of year. They abound in my back yard. They build nests various places in the yard. Sometimes they build a nest behind the stucco siding of my house. Wasps are hard to get rid of. All entry holes have to be tightly sealed and I have tried many methods attempting to get rid of them.

After one recent experience, I do not recommend vacuuming them out. It went like this: Armed with two cans of wasp spray, I got out the shop vac. The brand doesn’t matter as I was using the attachment with the narrow slot to get up under the stucco. Putting on leather garden gloves, sun glasses and a hat, I stood as far from the outside wall as the length of the vacuum hose would allow. I plugged in the shop vac, held the attachment in one hand and readied a can of spray in the other. In retrospect, I probably should have had a bee keeper’s hat with netting, but I didn’t think of that. The idea was to suck the wasps out from the nest and spray any errant flyers. This did not go well.

What really happened was that after a few minutes of being vacuumed, the wasps became quite agitated. Many of them escaped the narrow slotted attachment and came looking for the enemy. I changed vacuum attachments to use the one with the round, open end. I managed to suck quite a few of the now angry wasps out of the wall, but many more were coming toward me. There I was, in the back yard with my shop vac and wasp spray. I began alternating between sucking the wasps out of the wall and spraying the attacking flyers. It was a real battle of wits for a few minutes there. Sucking, spraying, sucking, spraying. Then I started dodging them. I have no idea what the neighbors thought. Some woman dressed in disguise bobbing up and down, wielding a shop vac hose and spraying something from a can while wasps swarmed. Quite a sight, I’m sure.

Truthfully, I did get many of them out of the wall. Some even went into the shop vac. Some died a valorous death by wasp spray. But then, the shop vac started on fire. Now you should know that one is not supposed to spray a burning shop vac with wasp spray. This irritates the wasps and makes the flames jump. I did what any rational person would do when trying to escape an angry swarm of wasps and a fire – I ran. Spraying wasp spray behind me, I ran into the garage, slammed the door, and unplugged the shop vac. Thinking that the shop vac might be salvageable, I waited a few minutes for the flames, smoke and wasps to subside. Many of the wasps just went back to the nest but I counted lots of casualties. I had nearly prevailed! If not for the unfortunate fire, I would likely have eliminated the entire colony. The biggest casualty was the shop vac. Apparently their little motors do not survive fires very well. The plastic housing was also a little melted, making it look sad. The shop vac got put away in the garage and I decided to call an exterminator. I did not tell anyone about the whole thing as I am reluctant to admit when I have started small motor devices on fire. Who knew they needed a vent at the back? I just thought that by plugging it up I would be able to keep any angry wasps from escaping the fate I had planned for them. I didn’t open the shop vac for a while. There were too many wasps making noise in there. Sometimes it’s best to leave these things to the professionals.