Yet another study has documented the benefits of drinking coffee. Most recently, it was discovered that drinking coffee before working out enhances the results of your workout. Previously known was coffee’s ability to keep us alert. Now it is being said that coffee fights against diabetes, improves the skin and the ever popular: it contains anti-oxidants. As coffee consumption increases and the warmth of el Nino looms this winter, I wonder if the Midwest will succumb to an entirely different culture. Coffee drinking is increasing, warmer weather will occur. Trips to coffee shops are bound to increase. Would the Midwest would become sort of like the Great Northwest where coffee, and rain abound. Would we become similar to the state of Washington. Parts of that grand state boast a coffee culture like no other.

If we were, for example, like the Emerald City, there would be changes to wardrobe options, typically those that go from tres chic to Seattle grunge.   Most of us would agree that a beret is a pretty good look for nearly everyone. Paired with a khaki rain coat, it’s a very nice statement. Others would find Doc Martens, jeans and a flannel shirt to be an ideal ensemble. Remember, they tie their flannel shirts around the waist in the (unlikely) event of an outbreak of sunshine. If the Midwest experiences warmth and rain like Seattle, would there be an evidence of a vast array of umbrellas and a huge increase in the incidence of individualized portable coffee mugs.

Entertainment venues would surely undergo transformation as well. Things like poetry slams, bongos (yes, actual bongos), dim fluorescent lighting and small, intimate coffee venues would be more commonplace. Establishments like Minneapolis’ Wilde Roast Café or Uncommon Grounds coffee bars would be de rigueur. As a barista I would be in such high demand that coffee mugs with my photo on it would be seen everywhere. In addition to more readily available coffee service, there would likely be numerous lush green plants. These will be encouraged by all the rain and mildly chilly weather that may be our immediate future. I believe this will prompt a change in apparel choices that ward off the chill and an increase in indoor activities while it’s raining. Yes, it looks like we could possibly turn into the Seattle of the mid-West. Cool temperatures, lots of precipitation, abundant foliage, bugs, and critters of every kind. That includes the critters that are looking for “donations” outside the coffee shops. Yes, there will be coffee shops. At least two on every corner and everyone will flock to them with their computers. Dare we call them computer geeks? Silver lining: with all those extra computer geeks, maybe they could keep my Wi-fi from going down. Get an umbrella.

Warning: actual bongos below – play at your own risk!

I used to like my neighbors until they put a password on their Wi-Fi.